So
I was just reading Tortured for Christ by Rev. Richard Wurmbrand. And all the
evils of communism. Evangelism. The Underground Church. America. My role. Their
role. National sins. It is a heavy load of things to consider.
And
I was thinking about how I would like to go to Russia and Romania and similar
countries, countries bound by communism and other governmental and systematic
ideologies that war against the glory of God. And how it seems like it would be
so much easier to be part of a desperate people, the underground church. In my
mind it is easy. People are converted. People are desperate for Jesus. Wurmbrand said he has
rarely met a lukewarm Christian in Romania.
And
then I think about here. Katy. Waco. Some of the most affluent areas in the
world. The largest Christian university. America. The West. It feels so much
harder. (Of course it is absurd to compare my cushy life to his, considering the
massive trauma and suffering he went through for the sake of Christ).
Operating
in a culture of wealth, lukewarm complacency, and easy offense. It is the best
place that feels like the worst. Here we have the most resources, programs,
entertainment, books, everything. It’s all here, wrapped neatly in a freedom of
religion that seems at the moment to strangle me.
I
want to be bold for Christ. Talk about my love for Jesus. Walk out in a
contagious way that shines brightly like a flashlight along a dark trail. I
want to burst with Christ’s love and compassion. But so many times I feel
stifled.
I
think this is largely because I do not ask, and do not follow through in what I
am given. Obedience has been impressed on my heart. I believe Christ is capable
of so much. I believe God can do anything! Yet so often I hold all these treasures
tightly to myself and never release them. I have belief, but no faith. Faith
without works is dead. Belief is faith without action. I want to practice what
I am learning—what I believe.
And
moreover, I have been thinking about what it looks like to do ministry in the
U.S. If Richard Wurmbrand can do ministry in a communist prison while enduring
unspeakable torture, all in joy and faithfulness, then the obstacles we face
here can also be overcome. But what does that look like?
It
has to be adapted somehow, for sure. But if you can reach some one whose heart
is hardened by brainwashing and hatred, surely there must be a way to speak love
into my generation and my people. This is something I’m going to have to think
more about. I’m sure there are lots of experts who have the answers to all
these questions. I’m interested to see what my role is, here and other places.
How can I be obedient, today?
